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Bad News Letters
When to Use the Bad News or Indirect
Style:
You will use this style of letter when you
want to deliver your message in an INDIRECT fashion. You anticipate that the
reader will not be happy about receiving your message. Examples of "bad news"
include:
Bad News:
Bad is a qualitative word! It isn't a death
notice, just not the news the reader was anticipating!
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The reader's application for credit with
your company must be denied due to a poor credit history.
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The request made by the reader is being
denied. This can be a request for a refund on a perceived poor-quality
product or a request for a change in an employee's vacation.
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Component Parts:
There are FOUR PARTS
(and at least four paragraphs) to each "bad news letter." These
include:
1st paragraph: Buffer.
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The first paragraph of a bad news letter
contains no mention whatsoever of the bad news. Instead, it is a buffer.
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The first paragraph should try to put the
reader in a frame of reference on some point or points upon which the reader
and writer can agree.
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There should be NO MENTION of the bad news
or any reference to it in the first paragraph.
Examples include:
Thanks for the feedback you provided about
our service department recently. When customers inform us of their needs, it
is easier for us to respond.
Thank you for applying for the secretarial
position at our Harper City plant. Your interest in our company is
appreciated.
2nd paragraph:
The RATIONALE or REASONS for the upcoming bad news.
In the middle paragraph, you must begin to
explain to the reader why his/her request cannot be granted. Again, there is
still NO MENTION OF THE BAD NEWS in the second paragraph. Instead, refer to
company policy that is not consistent with granting the request. By the time
the reader finishes reading the second paragraph, the bad news should be a
foregone conclusion.
Examples include:
Quality in customer service is our goal.
You can be assured that your request has received our attention. In order to
keep the prices you find at Harvey's Home Show low, all products are sold in
large quantities.
The key to a well-run office setting is
hiring the right person for each position. In addition, it is necessary to
match the skills and attitudes of applicants with those required for the
position.
3rd paragraph: BURY the bad
news in the middle of the third LONG paragraph.
Be careful to bury
the bad news. Again, the buffer at the beginning of the paragraph
should continue with the rationale for the decision or, whenever possible,
offering of alternatives that may help the reader solve the problem has
without exactly granting the request he/she has made.
Focus on what you CAN do to help the
reader, not what you CAN'T do. Suggest alternatives or other options that may
meet the reader's needs just as well as the thing you can't do.
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All customers are asked to carefully read the Members Handbook that
accompanies every application for membership before submitting a completed
application. In that handbook (on page 6) the terms of membership were
outlined, including information concerning member benefits. When you review
page 6 of the Handbook, you will be reminded of Benefit #2: "Buying in bulk
saves you money." To accomplish this, you can select only whole cartons of
products.
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Following extensive interviews with more
than 10 candidates, the Executive Secretary position in the Human Resources
Department has been filled. Another candidate was selected for the position
and has accepted that offer. Your application will be kept on file for the
next six months and will be reviewed against requirements for any position
that comes open during that time.
4th
paragraph: Off-the-subject Close: The last
paragraph of the bad news letter makes no mention of
the bad news. Be careful not to remind the reader of the bad news
either. Objectives for this paragraph are to try to maintain the customer's
goodwill and keep him/her as a customer for the future.
Unlike other letter styles, in a bad news
letter, it is not a good idea to invite further discussion. (Such as: If you
have any other questions, please feel free to call me at xxx-xxxx.) You have
stated your decision and your reasoning for it. To invite further discussion
implies that you are open to negotiation or that you might change your mind.
This is not the case, and you do not want to imply that.
Examples of last paragraphs:
Look for the special flyer that will be
coming to your mailbox in a few days. You will receive coupons that will save
you even more as you buy all your household needs at Harvey's.
Thanks for your interest in our company.
Best wishes with your continued career plans.
Other Content Notes:
Remember to use the YOU approach.
Don't begin a sentence with I or we or the
name of the company (or "our company"). Try to begin sentences with you, but be
careful not to blame the reader for his/her actions. Answer the questions that
are always on the mind of the reader: "What's in it for me?" "What's this letter
going to do to help me?" This is a little trickier for a bad news letter than a
good news one. Don't start the sentence with "you" that ends up blaming the
reader. Be careful!
Maintain a professional tone.
While the bad news letter won't be upbeat and
positive, it need not be NEGATIVE. Be careful not to use negative-sounding
lead-in words or phrases such as "Nevertheless," "Although," or "In spite of the
fact that" These set up the negative message that is coming.
Don't APOLOGIZE for the bad news.
Ask yourself what will be gained by an apology? The answer is
"nothing!" When I say "I'm sorry," does it make you feel any better? Not really.
Does it change the situation and give you what you wanted? No. Therefore,
apologizing in a business setting when you must say "no" is a waste of time.
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